personal quotes..

[Roberto B]

camdiver has really interesting personal quotes.. actually, i encourage him to post the previous one..

this is the actual one:

"My girlfriend always laughs during sex, irrespective of what she's reading".


mark thorpe
www.oceanstockimages.com
camdiver65[@]gmail.com

and yours?..

[Mark Thorpe]

Shhhhhhh, not so loud fer chrissakes. She'd kill me if she found out! S'a good job she's almost blind I guess......

[Joe Carney]

camdiver has really interesting personal quotes.. actually, i encourage him to post the previous one..

this is the actual one:

"My girlfriend always laughs during sex, irrespective of what she's reading".


mark thorpe
www.oceanstockimages.com
camdiver65[@]gmail.com

and yours?..

Somehow the voice of Woody Allen pops into my head when I read that,lol.

[Roberto B]

new one from mark:

"If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?"

mark thorpe's quote of the day..

[Roberto B]

"One of my pet peeves is women who don't put the toilet seat back up when they're finished!"

mark thorpe
www.oceanstockimages.com
camdiver65[@]gmail.com

mine too.. :) but if she's gorgeous i give her a penalty..

[overlandfilms]

I think my favorite is one I've heard my agent use on several occassions... "Tell them to go s*** in their hat."

[Mark Thorpe]

mine too.. :) but if she's gorgeous i give her a penalty.. Don't ya just love dishing out those penalties! heheh

[Gavin Greenwalt]

I am on my third phone in one week with AT&T and today this accidentally came out in my warranty call.


AT&T: Would you like to purchase the express shipping option on your warranty today for an additional $7.95?

Me: No but I fully expect it to show up in the next two days for free since I payed for that option last time you mailed me a defucktive phone that broke in less time than it took to get here.

I now have a new term for all less than functional products.

[Mark Thorpe]

tehehe, he swore!

[Jaime Vallés]

Defucktive... brilliant!

[Roberto B]

"My new health club is so fancy, they have a spiral StairMaster!"


mark thorpe

[explosive]

"Thank god I'm Catholic so sex will ALWAYS be dirty."

[Mark Thorpe]

hehehe

[Roberto B]

last one from mark.. mark thorpe.. red circle on the corner.. ehehehehehe

"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older...
Little things like, being spanked every day by a middle aged woman."

[Roberto B]

"Science enables stories. Stories drive science."

graeme nattress

[Graeme Nattress]

"Expansion leaves the ashes of change."

Graeme

[Jonathan L. Bowen]

"The free man is a warrior." -- Nietzsche ;)

[Tom Lowe]

"Don't tase me, bro!"

[Ramesh Jai]

"I have clients who plan tomorrow for yesterday".

[number6]

Duckbutter

[Phil Becque]

One of my all time favourites:

Everyone seems normal . . . . . . until you get to know them.

If you have a few minutes here's a bit of rib tickler:

I have recently been having a few problems with my old doctor so decided to find a new one. I devised a test to see if I felt that a potential new Doctor would be adequate. The one I chose gave the following answers to these questions:-



Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... Don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.


Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!


Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.


Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!


Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

A: You're not listening....Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you. Even if they were fried in dripping or lard these are fats that are produced by the cow processing vegetable products?


Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.


Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable. It's the best feel-good food around!!


Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.



And please remember, there are four major food groups, Beef, Whisky, Beer and Black Crunchy Bits. Everything else should be categorised as "garnish" and left on the plate at the end of the meal.

[Adrian T.]

"Jim Jannard is the king. We are but the farmers between the shells."

Han Mivsnew (http://www.reduser.net/forum/showpost.php?p=87992&postcount=3)

[Roberto B]

mark's last one..

"A man is only as big as the dreams he dares to live"

[Jonathan L. Bowen]

"Don't tase me, bro!"

hahaha, that's so funny, my business partner and I were quoting that constantly on our last shoot. We have these quotes we keep saying, that's one of them, and it's just funny to inject it randomly into any situation. Don't tase me, bro!

[Ramesh Jai]

hahaha, that's so funny, my business partner and I were quoting that constantly on our last shoot. We have these quotes we keep saying, that's one of them, and it's just funny to inject it randomly into any situation. Don't tase me, bro!
Sounds nice - what does it mean? (Don't test my patience?)

[Roberto B]

"If you have scenery, and I have scenery, and I have a voice that reaches across your lines and starts to chew your scenery. I chew the scenery! I chew it up!"

shawn nelson..

[Nathan Garofalos]

"I think I should spend a little less time making movies and a little more time making out in movies..." lol just kidding.

[number6]

"If it ain't broke... rob it!":gun:

[GlennChan]

Sounds nice - what does it mean?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3FFnpS-eYA

(The quote is actually kind of not funny because the student says it before he gets tasered. He is really being unnecessarily assaulted in my opinion.)